II Cor. 12:9 - And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.
I've quoted this verse often, I've sung the song His Grace is Sufficient for Me but recently God has been showing me some things about His sufficiency. When we think of something being sufficient, we think 'it is enough', 'it will do what I need' or 'it will cover it'. Yet in thinking of God and His grace I have realized that His definition of being sufficient is far different from ours.
Sufficient from God is overflowing, it everlasting, it is unchanging, it is all we could ever need. Sufficient from God is so much larger, deeper and boarder than our minds can imagine. His strength is made perfect in weakness. His strength, the all powerful God, His strength is made perfect in weakness.
Paul says he will glory in his infirmities that the power of Christ may rest on him. So, seriously, when is the last time you GLORIED in your infirmities, your sickness, your weakness? Spending the last week being sick, not even having a coherent thought in my head to write, mumbling about how I miss this and that, I was NOT glorying in my infirmities.
Yet tonight it strikes me, God has been here every moment. He has shown me love and mercy. He has lifted me when I could not lift myself. He has comforted me when I was at the bottom. Tuesday night I did not sleep, not a minute, not even a quick snooze. I was awake all night long. I wasted a lot of that time grumbling and mumbling about how tired I was going to be.
Then I decided to check out some prayer requests and see if some folks had updates on situations we were praying for. I was humbled as I saw the horrible things many folks were going through while I grumbled about not sleeping. I was horrified to see people struggling to live while I complained about struggling to sleep. God gave me some real perspective. He also gave me strength.
I made it through Wednesday, having not slept since Tuesday morning. I'm sorry to say I didn't make it to church and I realize now that may have been lack of faith on my part. I had been up for 36 hours when it was time to leave for church and I was very tired and coughing a lot. I drive about 35 minutes each way to church. I would have had my granddaughter with me. I faced a serious and real question, could I stay awake to drive there and back safely. I wasn't sure. Because there could be lives at stake I didn't chance it. Was that the right decision? Or was it a lack of faith that the God who had supplied my strength all day, would give me strength for a few more hours?
I don't honestly know, but I do know that as I prayed that night, I was not plagued by the question, so I'm at peace with it. I also know God gave me a great night's sleep Wed night and again on Thursday I was able to function. I also know I missed being at church. I missed my church family.
I know that when my pastor was doing prayer requests on our phone on Thursday and he included my name, God showed me that I was not in this battle alone. As I went to our Stronger page (a page for a group of us that have gone to the Stronger Retreats) and saw prayer requests and had people tell me they were praying for me, I again saw God's grace in abundance.
You see everything God does is so much larger than we can imagine, when He says sufficient what that means in our lives is abundance. He gives freely and His love is boundless.
Today, think of His grace, what it has meant in your life, the times He has shown Himself to be Faithful and True.
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